The girls have a play coming up. They do tend to be in a lot of plays, what with their extra-curricular theater doohickey AND the annual school play. Last year's school play was their first, because I hadn't signed them up for the extra stuff yet. It was a big deal to them both. Their father came, my parents came, my brother came.

Now this year, they're involved in the extra-acting thing, and their father is closer for the academic year. He's come a few times for those plays, too.

Now the school play is coming around again, and E is not cast in 3 bit parts with no lines like she was last year. Now she shows the signs of someone who's been in 4 productions in a single year, and landed herself a very good role for a 5th grader. She's very excited, and proud. We told her father the dates of the play back in November, and have reiterated it at least 3 times.

I had emailed him on Friday to try and work out the weekend plans, since E wants to do things with her friends as well as with my parents, and yet it's important that she spend time with her father when she can. He responded that he didn't know yet, and he'd "let me know." I responded back that I am more than willing to give him first priority with the girls' time, but I'm not holding the weekend open forever, and I need to know by the end of this weekend. I was nice, though, and did not cause an argument.

He responded with a general idea of what he'd like to do, which was fine.

30 minutes later, he e-mailed again.

He forgot about a meeting.

The same day as the play.

He's not coming.

He wants to know how E will "take it."

What am I supposed to say?

"She will absolutely remember this forever, just as she'll forever remember that you didn't tell her that you were getting married, or that you did get married, or include her in the process."

Or, perhaps, "Well, every time we talk about her relationship with you, she brings up the fact that you never listen to her, and that you treat her like a baby, but perhaps this will replace that script?"

I could always aim to lessen the strength, "oh, don't worry, it's such a busy weekend, she won't have time to be upset. It will be fine."

Which is probably true. Until she gets pissed off at him for something, and then the first option will kick in.

Ugh.

Beloved said he thinks we should take away the ex's cell phone. Clearly, he hasn't proved his responsibility.

Labels: ex-relations

posted by Zuska @ 9:50 PM

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