on this lack of motivation to do anything law-related. Today is really only the second day, but it feels horrid. I think that I'm not giving enough credit to the fact that my Beautiful Ones are not home, and I miss them, and I don't like them not being home. Their absence also messes with my routines.

Today it was so bad - coupled with yesterday being so bad - that i'm home. I didn't go to school. i stared at books and hung shelves instead of reading for today's classes, so i made the decision to stay home and do the reading for the classes instead of attending the classes without having done the reading. And in between reading, spend the time straightening the house for both the girls' homecoming tomorrow afternoon, and my parents' visit on Saturday.

how productive have i been toward either of those goals? not at all. actually, just posting on my blog is a showing of increased productivity over the past 4.5 hours. I went for a run. at 8. i took a shower. i made coffee. really, that's it.

This is the first time I have *ever* just stayed home from school. I never skip class. I'm a nerd like that. I just feel so disengaged from school right now, that I felt that it was a good day to stay home. Beloved gave me a funny look when I shared my intentions. I justified myself to him by pointing out the fact that once the girls are home, our old routines are back in place, and there is really no chance of missing ONE DAY of class turning into a trend. He either agreed, or pretended to, and left me alone about my purposeful irresponsibility. well, he did cast a hateful look my way this a.m. while he was dressed in his work garb and i was lounging around in a nightgown.

So hopefully after I post this, I will be able to continue the uptick of productivity, and create SOMETHING to show for this day. Something. Either some reading, or some cleaning, or some organizing, SOMETHING.

i miss my girls.

posted by Zuska @ 1:18 PM

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