parens binubus

more than you want to know about a law school graduate/bar examinee who is also raising two children and doing her best at being a partner to her love.

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  • Tuesday, July 24, 2007
    I slept well last night, since I'm not a Tuesday person (best of luck everyone!). I woke earlier today than I've been, so that waking even earlier tomorrow will not be a problem for me. I knew pretty quickly, "shit, the bar exam is tomorrow" and then I thought, "wow. what if today was Wednesday, and I forgot to set my alarm, or overslept or something?" and I got butterflies.

    Now, 30 minutes later, I'm checking bloglines, seeing posts by the above-linked Tuesday people, and again, the irrational "what if" of today being the day, me getting the days mixed up, and the exam actually starting in 30 minutes.

    One of the first things I thought when I woke up was, "huh, no anxiety dreams."

    I dreamed that Beloved and I were near a window, and it was sunny outside, and the wind coming in through the window was ferocious. It was hurricane wind. It was warm, though. I wouldn't let him close the window. We were just standing there, watching the wind come in (I could not see outside, but he was looking outside), and there were flashes, and then thunder. The sky, I knew, and sort of could tell even though I wasn't looking at it, was all sherbet-like and orangy, and there was lightning. Beloved shut the window against my protests, and I went into the other room, where the window was open and there was no wind, and the outside was normal.

    Still, it wasn't an anxiety dream. I wasn't naked. I didn't have a pencil that kept breaking. I didn't find that I had messed up the numbering of my answers as I filled in the last answer into the 99th bubble.

    Now I will go to the gym. Then I will come home and do note cards and questions all day.

    The advice given by all - to take it easy tonight, and stop studying - to that advice, I say "fuck you." Perhaps those who feel like they know everything can do that. I cannot! I have an excellent short term memory, and I plan to cram as much into it as I possibly can.
    posted by Zuska @ 7:53 AM  
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